A night out, a lesson thought?

Ooh! what a weekend?!! I have too weeks left to graduation. Its crunch time and everything is due this week. None the less, I was stressed from school and depleted from a lack of social living... plus it was a friend's birthday: so I went out. I all started out with an innocent barbecue but somehow ended up with me shaking 'da bootay' in the club whilst actively keeping all weirdo boys away, getting entertained with the arbitrary fights and ending up in a fender bender with a cab..... the 'sex-on-the-beach' was great none the less!

Okay so the main point of me blogging this is a conversation I had at the barbecue. I met a friend of a friend's who prefers to be called "Chido"... great guy, outspoken and hilarious! half way through the night, chido turns to me in the middle of conversation and says "why are you so 'goody-two-shoes?" I immediately jumped to the defense: "what do you mean by that? how do you know? i only just met you!" He proceeded to explain: "well, it just seems like you're so conserved. its not a bad thing, but i feel like if you open up more and be yourself, you just might enjoy life a lot more" WOW

I appreciate an outspoken person like that. Now, this might be offensive to some people, but people already make judgements when they see you. They might as well say it right? Additionally, It did not seem like he meant harm. He got me thinking. In my view, it simply takes me sometime to warm up to people and sometimes I am reserved; but to people I knew well enough I was a totally different, outspoken and perhaps loud person. I did not think I was fake because of that. I kept to my self in certain environments. I did not portray myself as what I wasnt. But when I thought about it last night, I was forced to ask: are we infact not being true to ourselves when we do that? is that a passive form of falseness that entails this subtle self withdrawal? Maybe we owe it to ourselves to always put our core out there but I am sure we find that society would frown on that...... but we do find some people with whom it is entirely accepted.
Maybe we all are fake.

~honesty~